palpitation spooked my body today as i got myself mentally prepared for i-pull.

i swear my erratic heartbeat could almost syncronise with the beats of the percussion ensemble from the soundtrack of "Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon".

okays. maybe i was exaggerating, but it was a tramautic incident only too hard and harsh for me to bear. i hate the feeling of facing failure once again at this point in time and i swear i could have gotten my 3rd one, prolly if i wasn't so stressed up, so freaked out, so chicken-ed out. at the very least from my previous trainings i had built a sense of commaraderie between fellow i-pull bronzers as we all tried our best to pull through. ( i literally mean pull thru. ) i am so very happy for those who made it! seriously! though with a tinge of envy, it would only motivate me further in attaining similar results as them.. Rights?

Right-O.

(When you left I lost a part of me...)

i've got homeworks plus math class assessment tomorrow to study for.
i kinda hate myself now.
i kinda hate the life i am living now.
i kinda hate it when i feel so hopeless and so caught up.
so caught up in all the studies.
i need some form of ventilation, i need help, guidance, encouragement, i need all of them.

(Who else am I gonna lean on When times get rough... )

i miss so many many people. all i wish for is the hols to come.
all i wish for is some time to myself.
all i wish for is my panacea to problems.
all i ask for is my elixir to reform me back into the positive optimistic girl i had been earlier.

(Who's gonna talk to me on the phone Till the sun comes up.. )

i really love the song.
it's so .. awww.....

(Who's gonna take your place There ain't nobody better We belong together )
that's all i want you to know.

ohh btw. nothing beats more than a hot water bath. a real long one..