heyox!!!! hmm..was doin dat stupid historie essay. my hands were on the verge of rotting. wrote hellurva loads and i hope trevor wud b pleased wid my essay. he had bad comments on my history midyear sayin much on my expressions. sho this time i did well. as in i had my heart and soul on it. well not exactly lar. cus i was oso smsing cy mar.den i guess it wasnt a 100% effort. im sho evil.haha.yeah. okies. i guess i got a lot to blog todae. kinda overwhelmed by emotions currently. oh ya.i went to popular wid jimmy ali and pl. den as usual jimmy said something idiotic sho i showed him a punch in the air. den i walked into the shop. den i turned to face the other direction a man jus showed me a punch in the air like omg. totally shocked me u noe. i duno wat to sae or do den i was staring at him in those like.. weird? eyes. i feel very scared at that pt in time. den i tot tat he was some psycho and idiot hu is like totaly crazie! insane. if he reali whacked me i will reali sue him for assault. dun care de. my dad will go crazy at whoeva hurts his dear daughter [ME!] hahas. :)

wells. as i was sayin. i had a lot on my mind todae.. was thinking of multiple things todae. been alil weird lately and ali can reali tell. im very senstive and now i was thinkin abt 32/04. i feel like im not reali well liked in cls and tat it isnt easy to mix around well wid ple. esp wid fiona they all. their wall [although it supposedly aint that hard] seemed sho hard to breach. i mean. i reallie wanna be included in them and i noe lijie got attempt to sorta include me. but can tell and feel that it is very different. i seem to be sho attached to alicia and al that it's hard to enter their clique. this has been on my mind quite often lately. i reali duno wat to do. i noe im sensitive but i cant help but think this way. jus tat i think too much oso. haishx. i noe they will say things like i think too much and it isnt sho. but sometimes i jus duno hw to react or wat to sae to them at times. reali hoped to haf beta relations wid them. this cant go on for the nex year as well. makes me think of 31/04. sorta make me miss them even more than b4. haishz. im super weird aint i? hmmms..
i was sms-ing chongyu jus now.frm lamin we started talkin abt 31/04 and hw much we missed them and everyone too! haishx.
cy: i miss everyone too...i miss ur stupid laughter..miss ng's super bright smile..kelvin's lameness...jimmy's sleepiness..n many many
shuling:[we were talkin abt our cls outin to sentosa and hw much fun we actualli had. me remembering that we were sittin on the monorail and i was stickin my head out and u were sayin that sooner or later a branch will ram into my face! and we were singing songs in the cabin too!] i think.. lar..
cy: yup..still got alicia's every willingnes to throw my bag for me durin maths..not forgetting how u turned my bag inside out and upside down..
shuling: i miss shaun's ever not funnie lame jokes and shak's OH! and adib rubbing his tummie.. [forgot wat i said exactly]
cy: haha... i stil rmbr how you gave a stupid blur look after ransacking my bag..then ask me how come still sho heavy..haha..i miss everyone..
shuling:yeah.that's kinda sad.haha.but we can always create new ones.that's for shure.haha.maybe even more stories to sae now. as we recount everything.haha.beautiful.
cy: haha...ya..but its bcos we may nv relive those memories again that makes these memories precious..

yeah. i reali missed all of them super loads. -nostalgia-
hmm..next thin is that.. well.. i m kinda troubled. as in over the cls stuff again. it's like i try my best to organise cls outings.some how or rather. until now there isnt a single cls outing. wat does this mean? my incapability? or wat. or reali jus proves that maybe afterall ple dun reali like me? huh.. i duno at al. duno wat i am suppose to think ani more. den it's like.. i feel tat im tryin my best to organise. den all these makes me feel like a real failure. cus i have yet seemed to be able to have one proper cls outing. i realli dun mind and wanna go sentosa noe. it's like go there plae. although ple maybe sian rites. but seriously i think it's a gd idea. duno hw to sae oso. after gettin tanned can always become fair again one rites? haishx. i duno lar. reali dun.. jus disappointed i guess.
i hate the feelin of failures. thursdae will be my pft retest le. it's comin soon. im not prepared. i noe that for a fact. im jus prayin that i will pass my incline. all i need is one proper pull. reali dun wanna fail again. wanan get it over and done with totally. hate it totallie manx. cant stand myself. i cant stand my arms being so weak. i duno lar. im super mixed up nw.
based on my feelins nw i reali dun wish to go for cca tml. jus wish to rest well and fin my assignments. i jus wanna rest. im very tired le. very sick of life recently.

im broken. wanna noe and wanna find that HIM. that reason to comfort me now.thanks to al those hu listened to me.n hu read this b log.i duno wat else to sae le. sorries. being emotional here. i noe.